My Turn

I would say that periodically we all come to a point where we ask - why? We are all capable of controlling our futures to a certain extent. We can goal and conquer over and over again but can it get so repetitive that it may seem we've plateaud? That what we once felt was helping us progress has all along kept us in the same spot? We outgrow people, outgrow opinions, outgrow choices we've made, change is inevitable. I don't wanna think back on opportunities that I may have passed up, but I am.

If life were like a chess game, it would be winning, but the game isn't over and at this point in the game, it's mine turn to make a move. 

I think it's time I start making bigger risks in  life. =)

BTW

Yep... I went much lighter.

Here's me and Kels working overtime. I tried to be all serious face. #fail But you can see the color better in this pic. I wanted it darker then what it is but decided to keep it this way for a bit and if I have a change of heart, I'll go tone it down. =)

Yay or Nay??

Aiming High

Working in the Binder, there are only two shifts. Day shift and Swing shift. Being there a year now, there is this sort of rivalry between the two shifts. Who has better production numbers or who produces the better product, even down to who has the better workers.

At the end of every shift, we are to clean up and sometimes help get jobs ready for the following shift.

While at work this past week, I worked along side a good friend. His name is Ryan. We were coming to the end of the shift and he kept making boxes. I told him we didn't need anymore and that the boxes he's making is only going to go to Day Shift. Ryan said that he was trying to be nice to Day Shift. I went on about how they never help us out so why bother. Then what he said really caught my attention..

"That doesn't justify the kindness we should be showing anyway."

I then realized that I have gotten caught up in this shift rivalry when what's really important was simply doing my job.

I now go into work everyday and do exactly what is asked of me and one day one of my co-workers walked up to me and said, "What's with this taking the initiative stuff?" I just smiled and said, "Just doing my job."

I don't want to look or sound like a show off or a "teacher's pet" type person, I just want to do what's right and I'm glad what Ryan said to me really helped remind me of WHAT'S RIGHT.

Life is good right now. I couldn't be any happier. What more could anyone say.

It's Glorious

Have you ever wondered what your life would be like in 5 years? Or maybe looked back 5 years and remember what you imagined "today" would be like?

I always do! I don't what it is, but I think I'm fairly predictable with my life's outcomes. I know you're probably wondering, "well you never guessed you would married Leroy LAST year." And that is quite true. But I DID know, I would marry him again. But overall, I can honestly say, I have an idea of what's to come for me and my life.

In the next five years, I will more then likely still be working at the Printing Division. I will be of "high value" there, so I will probably be head operating some sort of machine or machines. Maybe even be a Supervisor. I sure hope so. I think the Binder needs a little better Leadership and I feel I can help. I'm not saying I'm any better then the Supervisors now, but I think I can help.

A lot has been on my mind lately. With this new year and all and these new goals that have been set. I haven't felt this focused in a long time. These goals that I have are seeped deep within. It's like literally NOTHING can stop me from reaching my goal. Every morning, I say prayer, every night I say prayer. It's become so clear that it's slowly becoming habit. And it's a good one. It's a good feeling.

I want to share a personal experience. Something that has really reached out to me. It's something that is very close to my heart and I want to say that because of this experience, I CAN NOT FALTER.

We were driving home from church. This is last Sunday, January 4, 2015. And I don't remember what we were arguing about, but I WAS SO MAD! Me and Leroy just kept at it. I felt like we just couldn't find the middle of the argument to come clear with whatever it was that we were arguing about. But arguing loudly nonetheless.

We get home and I go help change the kids out of their church clothes and I just go straight to our room. I don't want to talk to him. He can cook dinner by himself. I'm in a "whatever" mode.

While I'm in the room, I'm sitting in the closet collecting hangers to hang up coats and putting away shoes. My blood is still boiling from our argument. I sit there and stare to the ceiling and for the life of me, I am pleading for help. My heart yearns to Heavenly Father for something, anything that will help me, to help us, to help our family.

As I get back to my closet cleaning, my Ipad was sitting on the drawer. My Ipad lights up and music starts to play. I am a good 4 or 5 feet away from my drawer. So yes, my ipad started to play ALL BY ITSELF. Now, not only is it playing, it's playing a Janice Kapp Perry song. I Walk by Faith to be exact. It didn't play from the beginning,  it only played a part of the song...

"I understand the meaning of accountability. Every choice for good or real is my responsibility. I want to build the kingdom and good works is the key. By doing what I know is right, I show integrity. I walk by faith. A Daughter of Heavenly Father. Divine am I in nature by inheritance and someday when God has proven me, I'll see him face to face. But just for here and now, I'll Walk by Faith."

After that, it turned off.

I buried my face into the palms of my hands. I couldn't hold back the tears after that. I felt as though Heavenly Father was speaking directly to me through my Ipad. I will never question the church or teaching after confirmation like that.

As I cried, I couldn't stop smiling. It was comfort and peace that immediately took over my anger and frustration.

This little moment of my life that happened only a week ago has changed my life forever.

I have been so much more happier, more appreciative and more grateful for this gospel.

I hope you all can find meaning in this life and include Heavenly Father in it.

Yesterday we had a Sister's Date Night. Planned by Lady Lehua. We went downtown to the Joseph Smith Memorial Building and watched Meet the Mormons.

This movie was so inspiring. I can't wait to take my little family. This is definitely something Leroy can benefit from. Here is the trailer in case you might want to go watch it too. It is free downtown.

My favorites would have to be the Missionary Mom because I feel I could relate to her story in different ways. My second favorite would be The Fighter. She makes me want to aspire to something greater. =)

The last thing I wanted to share was a song from the movie. Take a minute out of your day to sit and really listen to it. Anyone can relate to this song.

Glorious by David Archuleta

Let the year continue with this Spiritual High. It's keeping me together and bringing me to places I have never felt before. I'm not perfect. I will continue to hit bumps along the way and that's exactly what I want. The bumps in life remind me of the Savior. He atoned for my sins and for that I will show gratitude and keep on the straight and narrow.

xoxo Via

The Harvest Year

Well here we are 2015.

Happy New Year!!

Coming into this new year, I normally think of all he dreams and goals I have  planned to conquer throughout the year. This New Years was different for me. INsted of dreaming of new success for the upcoming year. I looked back on the preious year with true gratitude and I remembered all the things that have brought me to where I am today.

Goals for this year have been set. Ill share a few.

1. Understnding the gospel to the fullest.
2. Sharing and Living the gospel.
3. Go to the Temple.
4. Continue Education
5. Work hard to be the best Mom there is.

This year will  be different. I can feel it.

I was reading in a book last week about the belated prophet Ezra Taft Benson. Who grew up a farm boy and learned at an early age of hard work. I wanted to share something that caught my attention.

"He came to know in those lean days that without hard work, nothing grows but weeds. There must be a labor, incessant and constant, if there is to be a harvest."

"Throughout the years of his mature life, when he walked with preidents and kings, he never lost the touch of his boyhood farm days. He never lost his capacity for work. He never lost the will to rise at dawn and wok into the night."

Before, I would have picked up a more modern day book. But with all these changes and coming into this new year, I decided to learn basics from the Prophets of old. And I have to say, I really like the change I'm feeling inside.

Humility is big. Gratitude is big. Love is big.

This year is my "harvest" year. The year I will go head up with EVERTHING that tries me. EVERYTHING that tests me. EVERYTHING that challenges me.

This is my harvest year.

Xoxo Via

A Bit Of Humanity

Friendship. 

I don't think any one person can live without a friend. And if they do, then that's what I would call a cold world. You have hi and bye friends. You have hey lets have lunch friends. And then you have friends that have keys to your house or use your car on the regular and you know that's ok because you've reached that level of trust. I have a friend that has become a regular in my life and Tamara and Henele's life. I know I can tell her anything and get an honest judgement back that I know I won't feel bad. 

I tend to catch expressions. Facial expressions that speak way louder then words. I don't like to be taken advantage of. But recently I feel that I am. From rolling eyes to "smerks." You know the ones I'm talking about. 

Taking a step back and thinking about it all. I know that the only true people I can trust is my blood. As much as I would love to help as many people as I can through life struggles. When i talk to people, they talk and I listen. But it gets overwhelming for me. Cause I feel what they feel when they share. 

I HAVE to be mindful of what I say and how I say it because of how trusting people are telling me things. I also have to be careful of what I share. Because in the end, when they end up turning their back on me, I would have handed them all their bullets through the things I willingly shared. 

My brain will resort to a little bubble. An indestructable bubble. One that only few can make their way in. 

lol I get so lost in my own analogies that I don't make sense sometimes. That's what happens when your brain runs at warp speed and your fat fingers can't type worth crap. haha 

T&H

Be friends. Choose wisely who you share the deep things with. Make sure you build strong bonds with your TRUE friends and always be mindful of what you share to cover your bases. Don't feel inferior of saying what you FEEL and what you KNOW is right. And always smile. Remember, when it comes to friends, your SMILE is the key. =) 

xoxo Via

Just Lovely

Sometimes life is like bulls in a chinese shop. A crack here, a chip there. WE ALL HAVE CRACKS AND CHIPS IN LIFE. And as much as you try and avoid the fact, they will always be there until you decide to seal it. And sometimes avoided cracks slowly grow so big it becomes unavoidable. You have to fix it. But what sucks in these instances is that some of the things that grow big and become unavoidable become permanent because of lack of care or we've resorted to just plain giving up. 

We become damaged. 

Everyone deserves love. True love. Yes, this has already been established forever ago. And what I think, is that the damage that we slowly create throughout our lives can only be fixed through your true love. 

Life is short. 

You do not get unlimited chances to have the things we want. This I know. Nothing is worse than missing an opportunity that could've changed your life. So make your move now. Sometimes when you think you have that opportunity and you think it will always be there, might not be and when you realize it's lost, you look back. 

I think part of the reason why we hold on to something so tight is because we fear something so great won't happen twice. But if you don't know FOR SURE that it's that great, should we hold on?

I'm in love with himm. But I've been waiting in the storm long enough, I may need to adjust my sails. I don't know what I'm waiting for. I just hate not knowing. It's like I've been walking in super thick fog. I can't see where I'm going. I can only see the next step and for some of us, the next step is enough. And if I'm being honest with myself, I need more then just the next step. 

This time, I'm gonna forget about my happily ever after. It'll make it's debut when it's right. 

ALWAYS BELIEVE THAT SOMETHING WONDERFUL IS ABOUT TO HAPPEN. 

xoxo Via