Stumbling Stones

Behind every girl, there's a man who did her wrong and made her strong. Things happen. People change. And while all of these things are going on, I feel like it's spinning around me way too fast for me to even see any clarity. I feel blind.

It's like Lehi's vision of The Tree of Life. I'm grasping on to the Iron Rod and I don't want to let go. The mist of darkness is overwhelming me. All I know to do is to hold on and don't let go. My heart aches to see the Tree so bad. To partake of the fruit and to learn the meaning of true happiness.

He's already made his way to the great and spacious building. Can someone that has gone there make there way back to The Tree of Life?

"I never said it was going to be easy, I only said it was going to be worth it."

Sacrifice I can manage. I've done it before and I can do it again. Anything for the Kids. And if this is advice from Bishop, how can I question it? After all he is a messenger of the Lord. Or is this me making an excuse to make things work for my family?

He sounded sincere. I felt like he really meant what he said. But all his lies have added up so fast that even my feelings aren't enough surety. Bishop went on about how Heavenly Father didn't want things to be easy, that he only puts you through trials he knows you can overcome.

I'm still debating on if the trial is to help him and try and get him to understand where he went wrong and help him change or if it's me being a single mom and doing the best I can without him.

How will I know?

My prayers lately seem so repetitive. I feel like I'm missing something. Tamara has got her down. I feel like her prayers are more effective then my own.

I just want someone to tell me what to do. No advice. No questions. Straight answers. Like a simple "to do" list. I'm good at following instructions. If only life came with a modern day manual of what to do, what choices to make or even what to eat. I have too many questions and it's distracting me from the enjoyment of my Kids.

I continue on down the road. I could only remember as a young child enjoying such a bright sunny day and only wishing that the sun would stay up in the sky forever so I could simply play forever.

My smile continues to cast over the beauty of everything in sight.

I put the car in park and step out baffled to what I saw before me.

The road stopped. It looked as though the road was built and they ran out of asphalt and never returned to finish it.

I put my hand above my forehead to shield my eyes from the sun. I look out into the open field in search of any other pavements I might have missed.

Where do I go? What do I do?

As I look around I ask myself, "Do I turn back?"

The thought of what I had already gone through races through my mind. I turn around and familiar feelings gush through my body as I stared. 

There he was.

Prayer Rocks work! Well at least mine does. Whoever came up with the idea of a Prayer Rock gets two thumbs up from me!