"People are often unreasonable, irrational and self centered; forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; be kind anyway. If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies; succeed anyway. If you are honest and sincere, people may deceive you; be honest and sincere. What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight; create anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous; be happy anyway. The good you do today, will often be forgotten; do good anyway. Give the best you have and it may never be enough; give your best anyway. In the final analysis, it is between you and God; it was never between you and them anyway." - Mother Theresa

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

Full Hearted

A few things I want to update.

Tamara has now been baptized and confirmed a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.

It was an event that would change her life. She understands what her new responsibilities are and I can't wait for her to continue to excel in life and for to really start blooming into womanhood.

Henele had a dream last night. He woke up crying and ran to me. He said that there was a dog and bad people that were in our house and if anyone talked, the dog would eat us. I got eaten and so did Tamara. Henele was under the bed and didn't say a word. But what really hit hard on the heart was Henele crying out, "MOM I COULDN'T SAVE YOU! THERE WAS NOTHING I COULD DO!"

Its moments like this that really hit hard for me as a mom. I cried a little but my heart was so full of how he responded in result of how he loves.

In other news, my journey with Sutter Physician Services is coming to an end this Friday. I put in a notice last week and will resign on Friday. I absolutely am grateful for this company and all the knowledge I have obtained while working with them. I have gained many skills and can't wait to take it with me to my new job with SELECT PORTFOLIO SERVICES.

I am excited for the upcoming change and can't wait to see what is in store for me.

In addition to this change. I have picked up and am currently working on a new skill for what I call - my side hustle. I have been studying up on THE FOREX MARKET. It's a very complicated market and trade. But have been studying up on it since this past march. I am still very new to the trade and can't wait to see where it leads me. I do see this as a lifelong side hustle.

Happy Holidays!!! Christmas is just around the corner and I can't wait to take the whole season in! I'm happy with my 2017 overall \but cant wait to BEAST in 2018.

XOXO Via

Friday, November 17, 2017

Thankful, Grateful and Happy

Thanksgiving.

A time to take in all that you've been blessed with and thank the good Lord for it all.

I am super grateful for so many things. As sad as this might sound but one of my top listed would be my divorce. I remember being this happy before and I'm so glad that I was strong enough to take my defeat in a marriage I hoped would last an eternity and really really really found myself. I do still have a lot to learn and grow from. But as of now, I couldn't be any more proud of myself and the decisions that I have made for this year.

Things in my life have come together - again. Back to the single mom life and to honest, I wanna say that I am at my best when I am this way. I don't doubt that my super man is out there but I do know that before he can find me, I do need to find myself. Which I'm working on.

So this Thanksgiving, we will be celebrating in Vegas as a family. I'm excited and can't wait to take a nice little break with my family and kids. It is also the championship of my nephews football team. That's what chose the location. But overall I'm just so excited to take some time off and relax.

It's been quite a busy past few months with the kids in sports, back in school and me still working full time. I'm somehow managing just I did before.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and your loved ones. I hope you find lifes bliss and allow it to change your life for the better.

XOXO Via

Monday, November 6, 2017

Intermittent Fasting - Week 2

Day 8 Monday October 30, 2017 = 201.6 pounds (morning weight)
                Woke up this morning and weighed myself at 201.6 and am super happy with where I am at. I look at myself in the mirror and simply feel good. Even though my number are coming down slow, which I think should be since I am not working out just yet – I can tell my body is changing.

Day 9 Tuesday October 31, 2017 = 200.8 pounds (morning weight)
                Thinking about all the changes that have happened with the whole Intermittent Fasting I can say that as of right now, I feel really good. Those headaches I had at the beginning are gone. The stinging feel in my nose are now gone. I want to say that my body has now adjusted to the new changes. The fasting period is now normal to me. I do continue to stay mentally focused on the timing of my eating window. Overall as of now – I’m loving this new change.

Day 10 Wednesday November 1 = 200.4 pounds (morning weight)
                So since yesterday was Halloween, I held out my eating window for 1 hour, up until 7 pm. All for what? One piece of chocolate. Lol Now I made this chocolate. It’s a recipe I found on Pinterest. It’s called Keto Chocolate. The ingredients consist of; unsweetened baker’s chocolate, real butter, heavy cream and stevia. It tasted like chocolate and my one little piece I ate had satisfied my Halloween sweet tooth cravings. Lol
                Today has been good so far. I did randomly wake up at 3 am and couldn’t go back to sleep which was surprising cause I was the one walking the kids around the neighborhood doing all the trick or treating. I wasn’t tired at all and we hit our entire neighborhood which also surprised me. But yeah, I wasn’t tired, I was just cold. I’m wondering if my sleep patterns might change now that I have adapted to an 18:6 Intermittent Fasting routine.

Day 11 Thursday November 2, 2017 = 199.4 pounds (morning weight)
                I woke up at around midnight and couldn’t sleep. As I said yesterday, I’m wondering if I’m going through a sleeping habit change. I stayed up until about 4 am and got a lot of house work done. I’m feeling good and I’m still going strong on my intermittent fasting. I don’t feel weary or tired right now even though I had a weird awakening early this morning. I feel strong both physically and even mentally.

Day 12 Friday November 3, 2017 = 199.4 pounds (morning weight)
                Today. I feel good. =)

Day 13/14 Saturday November 4 & 5, 2017 199.2 pounds/198.6 pounds (morning weights)
                Alright so this weekend was not bad at all. The timing and food option was actually completely on point. Saturday my nephews had championship football games and the games finished about 1 pm. Which afterward we all celebrated at King Buffet. Now this restaurant is one of my favorites. I have never loved string beans as much as I did this day. I had beef and chicken and shrimp also. I was soooo stuffed that I was sure I was going to gain the following morning. But to my surprise I lost almost a full pound. I was so ecstatic Sunday morning. I also tested myself to see where I am in Ketosis and tested in full Ketosis. I was happy about that too.
Sunday was Tamara’s Birthday and she loves chocolate cake. It wasn’t hard at all refraining from all the sweets that were around. The only thing that I do need to work on is drinking more water.


“Second Week was easy breezy! I really handled this week like a champ and didn’t have any weaknesses in cravings or over indulging in the foods that I am currently eating. Third week can Bring It On!”

XOXO VIA

Saturday, November 4, 2017

It's Great To Be Eight!


My Dear Tamara,

I can't believe you are now 8 years old.
Not only is this huge to me as your Mom but it is also a major key point in your life as you are about to be Baptized. This point in your life really is important and I hope and pray that as you grow into womanhood you too can incorporate the importance of this milestone in your life. I hope that me as your Mom have done enough to help you reach this step and have prepared you for it also. I am excited for what is to come for you and how you bloom through this phase.
It's not easy glancing back on the past 8 years and all that I've been blessed with you in my life. There are so many memories rushing through my mind right now.
Like the time you said your first word - Mmmm!
Or the time when you took your first steps when we were living the Aunty Kuuipo.
Or the time you had bronchitis and all you could eat was Green Jello.
Or the time you left me and henele to go to Disney Land and for that entire week, Henele cried for you. (that was a trying week for me lol)
Or the time that I almost got into full on brawl at Winco cause some random lady was bullying you.
Or this past Summer when you finally learned to swim.
I can go on and on and on.
Tamara - I credit so much of who I am today: as a mom, aunt, teacher, friend and worker to YOU!
It's because of you that my life became so clear. You really have brought color to my world and I honestly couldn't be any more proud of you and all that you have accomplished thus far in your life.
I am so honored that I get to be your Mommy!
I love you with every bit of me.
And with all that you have taught me and have helped me grow to be, I will do my best to teach it all right back to you so you too can be as good as I have become.
I want you to be able to see the good in others - especially the ones that need it the most, whether they hate you or offend you or challenge you in ways that seem impossible to achieve.
I want you to know that YOU can do it! You can do anything in this world as long as your mind and heart are pure.

Happy Birthday Tamara Leethee Unasa,
You are the sparkle in my eye. =)
XOXO MOMMY

Monday, October 30, 2017

Intermittent Fasting - Week 1

Begin Date – Sunday October 22, 2017 @ 12 am (last ate Saturday Night @ 9-10 pm)
                First window of eating started Sunday @ 12 noon and went until 6 pm. I ate ribs, avocado, broccoli and a whole lot of ranch. Sunday’s eating was not bad. I am not counting calories. My stomach is telling me when to stop. After ending at 6 pm, just kept myself busy to get the time going.

Official Day 1 – Monday October 23,2017                                                            207.2 pounds (morning weight)
                Window of eating continued the same. 12 pm to 6 pm. From the hours of 9 till 12 I was super hungry. My stomach was calling for food. I did have a small headache and you know that feeling you get when you are upside down and the blood rushes down toward your head and you feel that sting in your nose, well that’s what I felt a lot of before I started my eating window and a little bit even after. I do think this is my body adjusting to the changes I am putting on it.

Day 2 – Tuesday October 24, 2017                                                                            203.8 pounds (morning weight)
                Window of eating continued the same. 12pm to 6 pm. The symptoms I felt yesterday morning are similar today just not as bad. I do have a headache and that sting in my nose is very minimal compared to yesterday. I do feel a little more alive to be honest. I feel a little more energy today. For my meal I had pork loin, steamed celery, an avocado and ranch dressing. I also did eat some strawberries. It is currently 3:30 pm and I’m feeling fine. 

Day 3 – Wednesday October 25, 2017                                                                     202.0 pounds (morning weight)
                It’s 8:30 am and I just got to work. Thinking hard about last night. From about 4-8 pm (let’s just say the whole evening) I had a huge headache. I never get headaches in general and I would say it’s simply cause I strong headed and hard headed. I’m the type that doesn’t allow shallow thoughts to cloud my judgement. I just don’t. But last night I had a headache. I hated it. I laid down on the couch and basically played on my phone cause the kids were not helping the need I had for sleep. So, I just laid there. Helpless. But snapchat was a good friend that kept me somewhat entertained. 
                Work is slow today. I been sitting for about 15 minutes and no call. I still work for an inbound call center. But in the comfort of my home is really what makes this job so easy and so great. I have prepped my meal for my 6-hour eating window. I have a California veggie blend and some salmon that is currently defrosting. I will season it in the next few hours.
                I’m down 5 pounds since official day 1 and overall – I’m liking the results, but the adaption is really what sucks. No headache this morning. I’m hoping it stays this way.

Day 4 Thursday October 26, 2017                                                                             201.0 pounds (morning weight)
                A few notes I want to jot down from last night. I was tired. I got off work about 5 pm and went to my niece’s volleyball game and throughout the game as attentive as I was – I couldn’t stop yawning. It was weird. I was there, alert and completely lost in the game, yet I was tired. When my niece scored the winning point kill – I jumped up and screamed at the top of my lungs and that’s when it really hit me. Major migraine. It was like, I there was way too much blood in my head that when I stopped screaming, I had to really stop and think about what was happening in my head. The stinging was so strong. I downed some water and on my way home I felt fine. So, I guess I may just not had enough water yesterday, although if I recall – I had tons of water. Idk. My 12-6-hour window remained the same. I ate Salmon, veggies and a piece of keto chocolate that I made. It was terrible! I threw it all away and relooked at the recipe I used, and it was way wrong. I didn’t put enough sweetener in it. I’ll attempt again here soon.

Day 5 Friday October 27, 2017                                                                                    201.2 pounds (morning weight)
                So today has been quite a good day. My eating window has remained the same. I don’t have any headaches or any off or weird symptoms. I honestly feel pretty good. Now with today being Friday and thinking back on my week, I have not incorporated any physical workouts in – yet. So with me downing about 6 pounds this week without any working out, lets give some workouts a try this next week and see what our numbers look like.
                Mentally, I’m content. I’m not like dying in thoughts of carbs and junk food. I actually have simply kept my mind on the results I want and where I want to be.
                This weekend will not hold any workouts – well I don’t think anyway. But still plan to hold my committed eating window to remain the same.

Day 6-7 Sat-Sun October 28, 2017             201.6 pounds – Sat / 203.2 pounds – Sun (morning weight)
                Ok. So this weekend was a challenging and not so challenging weekend. But I first want to go over Friday night. I got off of work at 4:45 and went with my two brothers to City Creek. We needed to fix a few broken Iphones at the apple store. So we dropped them off and they said that the wait time would be about an hour. This is 6 pm and after my window of eating. My brothers treated Great Steak and I ate a steak salad. So I actually closed my window of eating about 6:30. I didn’t mind. I didn’t push my window out a half hour later the following day, I just continued the committed 12 – 6 window.
                For both Saturday and Sunday – I was able to hold to the committed 12-6 windown and stayed complete keto with my meals. Now Saturday morning I ate a lot of cheese which is probably why I weighed 203.2 that morning. I have these Ziploc bags of cubed Colby jack cheese that are like my “carry around snacks” simply cause anytime I leave the house, food is just about everywhere. So I satisfy my watering mouth with my go to snacks. -=) But overall – Saturday was great!

                Sunday was also great. I ate a whole lot of sheep with keto ranch and grilled chicken with keto ranch. I haven’t had a sweet tooth yet which I am surprised with tomorrow being Halloween and all. I’m refraining just fine from all the candy the kids are obtaining through all these local Halloween parties and trunk-or-treats. 


“Overall – my first week, I am satisfied. It was rough in the beginning but I want to say that that was just me adapting to the changes both mentally and physically. I am happy with the results and can’t wait to see what this weeks challenges bring me.”

Friday, October 27, 2017

Coach Via

Oh Heyy!!

Things have simmered down since Tamara's last basketball game for the fall season. Her last game was last Saturday and it went just well. She scored once, not that we even keep score for her playing age group. But because she's my girl, of course I kept count. hahaa

Anyways. Coaching!

Coaching has been SUCH AN EXPERIENCE! There is way more pros then cons and that goes for the opportunity I had to coach Pre-K/Kindergarten and 1st/2nd graders. The two groups respond completely different but the fact that they are all just kids really did make my experience oh so much better.

I do have to admit - when walking into the Rec Center and the Staff sees me and yells, "Hey! Wassup Coach!" - I felt super cool. =)

Soccer is way more fun then basketball. Soccer was so simple and the kids had no issue following instructions but were WAY easily distracted. lol I remember joking with one of my sisters saying that our favorite play for soccer was - Stop chasing the butterflies! This soccer team has seriously been the best. I couldn't have had a more fun experience in this journey then being the coach for this little soccer team.

Leo - Leni - Isaiah - Hene

Now basketball on the other hand was little more challenging. One thing I learned about the ages of 1st grade/2nd grade is that they are harder to instruct and discipline. They have a different type of attitude when things don't go there way and they cry more. lol You would think I would be the other way around between the two age groups I coached but no. It was hard to simply explain that they have to work. That by itself. It's like a lot of them wanted to be an all star on the court without putting in hard work.

I had one player in particular that was so trying for me. He was the one that worked so hard but when things didn't work out in his favor, he would cry and get mad. There was so many times that he was fall to the ground and play the injured card even though he wasn't. This taught me a whole new kind of patience. I don't deal with this type of stuff with Tamara and Henele because that's just how I've diciplined them. But this is strictly basketball and I really had to be mindful of other parents and how they are upbringing their kids. So this type of patience really taught me some real empathy in the aspect of a mother. I don't judge other mothers and how they are bringing up their kids but when it reflect the outcome of my ability to coach, I felt I sometimes had to step in with "pep talks."

May have been challenging but it was definitely a learning point for me also.

Wesley - Sabdi - Tamara - Abram - Agustino

Overall, coaching has been amazing and absolutely loved the opportunity to coach my kids in their first sport seasons. Going forward, if I feel up to it, I do want to continue to coach. But for now, I think I will let others take care of the job. Not because this past round was too much for me but simply because I predict a few personal life changes occurring here in the near future and I want to make sure I can accommodate their sports lives with these predicted changes.

I'll save these changes for another post on another day.

XOXO Via

Sunday, September 24, 2017

Fall-ing In Love

The world is beginning to turn on it's axis.
The world is becoming cold.
The crisp fall wind hits the tip of my nose and turns pink.
The sun shines all the while.
The sound of wrestling leaves as they fall to the ground.
The taste of pumpkin and smell of honeysuckle.

The time of year that I call love.

So, I ran into this quote.

One day it just clicks.
You realize what's important and what isn't. You learn to care less about what other people thnk of you and more about what you think of yourself. You realize how far you've come and you remember when you thought things were such a mess that you would never recover. 
And you smile.
You smile because you are truly proud of yourself and the person you've fought to become.


Makes sense right?

I honestly couldn't be more proud of myself then where I currently stand in life. I've found life's bliss - again. When I felt like life was just crewl and I felt so helpless, as hard as I fought to simply give "what I though" was what my kids needed. It took me a little while to finally grasp that fact that not everyone's happily ever after is fighting to keep a family complete. But living life happily. Even if it means letting go.

I know I've talked about this a few times. But I wish I can put words to blog to really express how incredible I feel. How absolutely in-love with life I am. 

I have a friend at work that struggles the same that I once did and think back on it, and am just so proud of all of it. Of trying a second time. Of filing my second divorce. Of simply - still going.

I'm proud of myself and can't wait to see what life has in store for me next. =)

Happy Fall Everyone. 
XOXO Via

Saturday, September 16, 2017

The Twist

A few things.

I had been talking with this guy right? He's - whats the word? Driven.

He's constantly looking for ways to progress or move up in life. Talking, meaning, well going in a progressing direction I guess you could say. I don't know where it will go or if it will even go anywhere, not trying to sound cynical. I'm just in a place in my life where I'm simply happy re-finding myself. That's all.

Anyway, this guy has been so supportive of me and my decisions in life down to my daily tasks even. Just a big ball of positivity. Because of the type guy he is, he's sort of rubbed off on me and I've found myself doing things that I never thought I would be doing today.

Let's begin.


I was at work one morning, maybe last month. Just as school started for the kids. And it honestly came to me clear as the day. I was thinking about the kids and the new changes to our daily schedules with them going back to school. I've been dying to find a consistent gym routine that I know I can stick to and as I sat and thought about it all. The idea of "work from home" came to mind.

When I thought of it, it's like it wasn't even a question. It was a matter of how fast can I get home. This has always been an option with Sutter but I had this idea at work that I would work super hard and just promote to a high position and fast. But that isn't the case and life outside of work really plays a big part in work itself. They go hand in hand and need a really good balance. I've worked hard thus far with sutter since going full time back in february. My stats are meeting and I have no issue knowledge base. So I put in my request to work from home and it was approved this past week.

This is my little office space I've created in the back house for me to work from home. I am currently just waiting on my equipment to be delivered to me at work so I can bring it home and set it up and basically do it all from home.


Let's also add that Henele is playing soccer and Tamara is playing Basketball. The past few months have really been hard for me as a mom, they gotten a little chubby and you know me and my constant trying to get and stay fit. Well, they were growing in ways that I didn't want them to. lol So I signed them up for rec league sports and when I did, I offered the rec to be a parent volunteer. I was asked to come to the coaches meeting and I was all excited cause I figured going to this meeting I could persuade the coaches into a practice schedule that was accommodating for me and my work schedule. lol I get to the meeting only to find out that - IM THE HEAD COACH. lol and get this, I'm the head coach for both Hene and Tamara's team. lol

It's been a few weeks since soccer started and it's been going so good. I know nothing of the sport but after our first few games, I absolutely love soccer. I love hene playing it. I love running up and down the field with them. I love being active along side with him right there on the field. I feel soooo complete and happy. =)


Here's a little snippet of one our games last week.


With me coaching both teams, they've made sure our game schedules are scheduled so they don't overlap.

This morning we had our fist double game day. Hene's game was at 9 and Tamara's was at 10. Henel's games run close to an hour so right after soccer we run straight into the gym to get warmed up for basketball.

After today's double game day, I honestly felt sooo accomplished, tired, overwhelmed and inadequate all at the same time. The pressure of feeling like parents are hounding you because their kid isn't in playing is the hardest part.

Our weekly schedule goes like this.
Monday - sport break - homework/school
Tuesday - soccer game - homework/school
Wednesday - Basketball practice - homework/school
Thursday - Soccer practice - homework/school
Friday - sport break - homework/school
Saturday - double game day
Sunday - 24 hour sleep (with the exception of church)

This is what it will be like for the next few weeks up until jr jazz starts. jr jazz is a winter sport and I'm hoping both of them can be signed up for jr jazz. (without me being the coach of course.)

Well, there you have it.

Via is tired and busy and I'm simply LIVING. lol I love life right now. I couldn't be happier. Well I could but where I am at currently, it's great.

We all know I love the fall season. This is the season, my heart really beats. I can't wait to see how this all works out. Working from home.coaching and even thinking about getting involved with the PTA at school with a little bit of incorporating couponing back into the game.

If you dont hear from me in the next few weeks, clearly I'm busy. Life just took a major twist on me. lol

XOXO Via

Sunday, August 27, 2017

Like A Boss

It's been a long ass time since I've felt this good consistently. 

Key word - constant.


Since I made the choice to leave Leroy, it's like everything is finally right. Everything is back in order and I feel like I can take on anything.

I remember when we were still together, I had his help with the kids and things seemed to be manageable for the kids. But there was honestly I time where I sat and thought, "how in the hell did I do all that I did when I was a single mom!" I remember feeling overwhelmed at a point and we were in a pretty good position.

Now - It all makes sense.

I want to say, you can honestly take on the heaviest of loads single hand without any interruption or issue when things in your life are simply in order.

Now that Leroy is not longer a factor in our everyday living, I feel like I can take on the world. 

I feel that motivation, that adrenaline. And looking back on when I was questioning it all - I now understand.

With that be said and explained. 

I am still going strong with Sutter Health in the Billing Department. I've made a few changes to my path.

I have put in a request to work from home. I stayed in the office simply to try and promote and move up but I feel like I have plateaud  and there are a few too many people that are just seniority to me that it would take me some time to get to the next step up which is a lead. 

So, I want to work from home. I will still remain full time and I will even do my best to pick up overtime hours on saturday and sunday to make some extra money.

In addition to working full time, I plan to be as involved as I possibly can in the academics. I want to be part of the PTA Staff at the school and help out as best I can to keep in line with the kids at school.

While we are at it, we are also going to add EXTRA curriculum and Henele will be playing flag football while Tamara plays Basketball this fall where I also plan to help coaching basketball.

THIS is what it was like when I was divorced the first time. I felt like I could take on the world and it honestly feels like I am capable of doing so.

I'm just simply happy that I am finally in a good place in my life along with the kids.Now all that left is finding my one true love lol and taking on the world together. 

In the meantime, lets take on this fall season like a boss ayyyee??

XOXO Via

Wednesday, August 23, 2017

Glass Half Full

First Day of School!! Can you believe it? Tamara is now in the Second Grade and Henele will be in Kindergarten! 


Please allow me a few minutes to cry.

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Im just having one of those mommy moments. 

Tamara is the oldest going to school so her responsibilities just jumped up high. Henele and Nauleni are both in Kindergarten and in different classes. So making sure they are in the right line when the school bell rings and finding them after school to go wait by the flag pole for someone to pick them up is now her job. 


Im honestly excited for the school year. I plan to be a thousand times more involved in their school plans, education and classes. Last year was a little difficult to say the least givin a lot of my focus was elsewhere. But now that things are falling back into place, they will have a so much better mom involved in their school lives. 

Tamara and Henele,
I am super proud of both of you. I know things have been a little hard on you guys with your dad and I splitting, but do know that regardless of our differences, it does not change the unconditional love we have for you two. Me more then him, lol. =) With the new school year starting, I vow to do my best to help you each and everyday to help you succeed in scholar. 

I love you both sooo very much. I can't wait to see what this school year has in store for you both. Let's take on the new year head strong and take it on Day by Day.

Forever, Mommy.

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Tonight as I got the kids in the house to get them to bed and everything, Henele walks into the room and says, "mom, I can do the prayer." Talk about parent winning moment. It really opened my eyes and brought warmth to my heart knowing that the basics are right there with them. =)

Last thing I wanted to post for the night is this.

2 Days ago, Judge Faust signed off on my divorce. I am officially Via Langi again. Yes, it's a sad ending but I like to look at things glass-half-full and this is really the beginning to a new start. A fresh start at life and how {{I}} want to live it. 

I am happy. It's as simple as that.

XOXO Via

Sunday, August 20, 2017

To Love And Be Loved

Falling in love. Falling out of love. Falling in love. Falling out of love.

Tonight's post is simply on - LOVE.

The question has been hovering about for a little while now. Where do I stand on love? So I'm going to break it down into two sub-categories.

1. What I've learned from love.
2. Where I am at with love.

Love is only real when it's genuine/authentic. I ran across a saying a little while back.

"Since sex got easier to get, love got harder to find."

This rings sooo true in what reflects the world today. Nothing is genuine anymore. This saying 100% reflects the roots of Leroy and I. We started off this way and it all ultimately just came crashing down. Asking myself if any of it was genuine, I can say - at least from my standpoint is NO. None of it was genuine, again, at least from my side of the relationship. I even remember a point in time where I told myself that if just went through the motions of loving him as if it were genuine, it would somehow and some way, turn into the real thing.

It never did.

The love I have for Tamara and Henele - now that is genuine. That I see clear as day of true love, real love. That has not question whatsoever. So I know of a love that is true.

But let's break it down a little deeper and further for JUST MYSELF AND A POTENTIAL PARTNER.

With the history I've had, we are talking (technically typing) 8 almost 9 years of a fake or pretend love. Thinking back on all my past relationships, I have never known a real love.

So how do know when it's real?

That's the real question. Which leads me to where I am at with love.

Lately, I've had this mindset that - some people were meant to simply be alone. I feel this way. Maybe I was meant to be alone, no partner, no husband/boyfriend, just alone. And so I asked myself, can someone find happiness in an "alone" life? Cause that's why we find love right? love equals happiness equals life equals progression in the different aspects of life equals someone to share and love and hope and dream with.

But, if this wasn't an option for you. Lets just say that you've put yourself out there, you've mended and molded your personality, your character and even have the ability to adapt to accommodate your partner, and yet - alone is the result. is there something wrong with me or is no one really up to par for me? lol

I don't want to sound stubborn or big headed in any way cause maybe there really is something wrong with me.

I am open minded to it. But I can't let my life pass me by waiting for him to show up. So if he's out there, he will find me. He will know how lucky he is cause he will know how lucky I am. There will be no hiccups, questions or regrets. That's where I stand.

In the meantime - I will be doing what I do best. Taking it Day by Day, one project at a time,savoring every memorable moment as they come and simply live all while I WAIT.

If he shows up, he shows. If not, I will not hold back on all the dreams and plans I have in the works for this crazy thing called life.

I love and will love when the time is right and genuine.

XOXO VIA

ppssstttt. I LOVE 2017. It's been soooo good to me. =)

Sunday, August 13, 2017

My Hearbeat

Was thinking hard on my Son lately. So I thought to write an update on all that is currently Henele.


Thinking back on him this little really makes my heart jump. He has come soooo far. And because of him, I feel like as a mom, I'm doing it right. =)


I remember buying those DC Shoes from Ross. lol He wore them like twice cause we lost a pair.


One of my favorite outfits when he was younger. This was also one of my favorite photo shoots of the kids together.

During his preschool days when I would drop the kids off at school he would kiss me "most" mornings. I remember one of the other moms in his class complimented me cause the kids were all lined up to head into class and all the kids would wave bye to their parents and Henele would be the only one to scream out loud, "MOM! I LOVE YOU!" That mom would say, "you have an amazing kid."

I'm in love.

Take a look at a few snapchat clips of him recently. this will give you an idea of his personality type right now. lol


Henele O' Vikster. What A Kid!! He is sooo funny and keeps me SANE. When I'm stressed or overwhelmed, all I gotta do is be with him and I'm back to where I should be. I literally cannot function on a daily without him. I love my Henele O' Vikster. I couldn't be a more proud mom

XOXO Via



Tuesday, August 8, 2017

Gonna Have A Good Day

I'm gonna have a good day.

You know that song by, I think Nappy Rootz - Good Day??

This one.



I get to work everyday and I have this morning routine thing where I am always singing this in my head simply to put out into the universe that, IM GONNA HAVE A GOOD DAY. And most days, this works.

I'm sitting here at work and it's kinda slow and I thought to write a post to catch up on  the topic of "work"... I don't know if I've written about this, but I'm going to catch up on what it is I actually do at work. =)

I work for Sutter Physician Services. Sutter is a Medical Foundation located primarily in California.

I work in the Billing Department. I would say that overall, I do enjoy and like my job. I don't think I could have said that about my last job, no offense to the Printing Division. But what I do, I actually have no issues waking up in the morning and going to work.

It is a call center. I know what you may be thinking, 'oh no, another call center." But it's really not like that. I feel like I am in an actual doctors office. The calls that I take really make a difference in someone's life.

One of the better benefits of working in the field that I am in is understanding insurance. I didn't have the knowledge I have today to the extent that it is currently at. Medical insurance can be so complex but after working for Sutter for a year now, I understand and apply this knowledge into my own life.

I went to the pharmacy the other day to pick up Tamara's prescription and normally I would pay $20some dollars. This time, I pulled out both insurance cards and looked in the benefits on both and am now paying $6 for her prescription.

I've been paying this $20some dollar prescription once a month for at least the last year. Image all the money I could have saved just by understanding insurance.

Anyway, here is update on my Sutter Job. A job is a job but A job that you like can potentially turn into a profession or a career.

Tamara and Henele,

Love what you do. Sometimes you might have to go through the harder parts of a job in order to find a liking to what your doing. Patience is key to anything and everything you do in a day. Learn to take a step back and take it all in. Work hard so you can play hard and "pay hard" lol Bills will be constant so incorporate all the blessings around your burdens so you can have a well balanced lifestyle. =)

XOXO Via

Tuesday, August 1, 2017

Ratchet

Nothing bugs me more then ratchet people that start or say crap that is unnecessary and completely IRRELEVANT to them to begin with.

I stopped by the store earlier today and this random lady WITH her kids walks by me and says, "ghetto ass" I knew damn well she was talking about me. Minding my own business and all. I've had my fair share of fights in my life and I would honestly say at the age of 27 almost 28, I have graduated from that life. But that doesn't mean I can't tap back into old ways. lol

Today, I almost felt that adrenaline and I may have very well retaliated how my adrenaline wanted to.

But I didn't. Simply cause Tamara and Hene were with me. I just walked away.

Don't let ratchet people bring you down. It's a waste of time.

XOXO Via

Monday, July 31, 2017

Salinas / Monterey California 2017

So, I'm contantly wanting to update my blog with pictures with corresponding commentary and videos and what not right?


Because I am constantly busy and never really have the time to really post "media" on my blog how I would like to, here is what I will do from now on (hopefully).


I am in love with Snapchat! It's by far my favorite place as far as social media goes. With Instagram and Facebook, people have access to your past life / recent life and if I'm correct, there are "future events" you may be attending that people have access too.


I'm not about that life. So I no longer have facebook and Instagram, I still do, I just don't post as much as I used to.


With snapchat, everything expires in 24 hours. And boom - ITS GONE. lol well, im sure it mellows somewhere in cyberspace, but whatever. lol


When events or gatherings happen, I like to snap pictures and mini clips with snapchat and then later, I save them all to my phone and create a slideshow.


Here's my first reflecting our little vacay to Salinas - Monterey California 2 weeks ago. =)


Enjoy.



Sunday, July 30, 2017

Parent Failing And Parent Winning

So the other day, the funniest thing .happened.

I was home from work and Tamara and Henele were fighting. No, the fighting is not the funny part. lol

I was sitting there on the couch winding down from work and I hear Tamara yell at Henele saying, "YOU DONT TELL ME WHAT TO DO - IM OLDER THEN YOU!!"

I look over at them and Henele responds with - "IM 6 YEARS OLD!!"

*** rewind***

Now, Henele is only 5. He turns 6 this December. And for some reason, the past few weeks, he would constantly bug me about him wanting to be 6. I didn't think anything of it and would say, "yeah Hene, you can be 6." lol I've told him this a few times.

***back to the argument***

Tamara then, with a super smirky look on her face says, "YOURE NOT 6."

Henele says, "Yes!" looks at me and says, "MOM TELL HER HOW IM 6!"

I look at Tamara and as she raises one eye brow, she gives me the dirtiest look she says, "Yeah Mom!, Tell me how he is 6 years old????"

So here I am, stuck between my two kids. A few things could have happened.

1. Tamara could have just said, 6 is still younger then 7. Argument done. (maybe)
2. Tamara could have brought the issue to me for a final ruling.
3. Tamara calls me out on my bluff..

I give Tamara a look like "I just failed" lol and I had to break it to Hene that he is in fact, only 5 years old.

Real tears, real crying followed for a good 5 minutes.

Moral of todays post - Honesty is the best Policy. Even when it might seem minor. Bending the truth is still not the whole truth.

Although I have parent-failed and parent-won in the same situation, I have learned my parent lesson. lol

XOXO Via

Sunday, July 9, 2017

Tila Valu

 Here's a picture from last Sunday. My aunt Tila  from New Zealand has been in town and she came to witness the birth of her son Taanis  newborn child. Her name is Tila  named after her and this picture is of me and Tamara  filtered on Snapchat at her baby blessing eating. 

 It was a beautiful blessing and was so nice to break bread with the whole family. 


 Here she is. 

 I made sure I took a turn to hold her and by the time I got her  she was super tired. So I sat and rocked her to sleep.  It makes me miss how small Tamara and Henele used to be. 

Xoxo Via

New Chapters And Challenges

So today at church.  I saw the coolest thing in primary. We were having song time and the kids were singing the song Nephi's Courage.  We had two of the older boys go up in front of the primary to lead this song.  They were told to do actions and all. But the coolest part is in the middle of this song without being told a few of the kids sitting in the audience  stood up  and started singing and doing the actions of the song also.

 Watching the select few kids stand up and really sing this song Nephi's courage was one of those moments you open your eyes and see the small miracles of  heavenly father's work in play. It really brought warmth to my heart to witness this. it's moments like this that help me put life's perspective in the right direction not just for myself but for Tamara and Henele.

 This is my second week in this new calling as the CTR six class teacher.  My class consists of about seven kids.  Six girls and one boy.  Coming from the young women beehive class to this class is a complete change.  It's so much easier to get these young primary kids involved in class versus the beehive class.  I know most of their answers are  primary answers but this is honestly where their roots of their testimony begin.

 I'm excited to see where this new chapter leads me and my testimony. I know I have my own individual things that I need to work on and I want to say that these kids  are going to help me find some answers to questions I feel may have been  unanswered.

 My roots of this gospel still stand strong and firm. My trials have been many and I still take it day by day to keep my route strong.

 So here's to new challenges and new chapters in life. May we all use our trials to our advantage to guide us in the progress improvement  manner.

Xoxo Via


Sunday, June 25, 2017

The Release And The Call

Today marks an end to a 2 year Journey and the start of a new one. It was a bittersweet day today at church.


Ask of God, Ask in Faith. Our theme for the year. Today, the Young Women Presidency was released. After two years with these girls, I have grown to absolutely love them as my own. As our last lesson today in Young Women, the presidency decided to team up and give a "last lesson" We simply bore our testimonies for the girls and gave them these letters from each of us.
 From Me.
From Mona
From Les

My calling in the Young Women has come to an end and I will definitely miss it, especially the girls. After my release, I was then called to the Primary!
I know, I was the Primary Second Counselor for 3 years then the Young Women Second Counselor for 2 years and have returned back to the Primary. But this time as the CTR 6 Class Teacher!
I'm excited for this new Journey and can't wait to go back to the simple roots of gospel doctrine. 

I love this gospel and don't think I say it our loud enough. So with being said, let it be known that 
I AM A MORMON! 
I definitely do have y flaws an a DAILY that I think need some adjusting which is why I believe I have returned to this capacity. I - myself - need to go back and start from the basics.

So here's to sweet farewells and new journeys that are meant to be.

XOXO Via

Keto

 So, Keto.

Keto I wouldn't say is a diet, but a lifestyle. I've been Keto since February of this year. What Keto is, is where your food intake is High Fat's w/ good oils and Low to Zero Carbs. I remember when my cousin Taina first introduced it to me, I thought - that sounds a little backwards, cause anyone on any type of diet would say - no fats. I guess it's what we come to think is correct growing up. Well - the science behind Keto we said by Keto Coach after Keto Coach to be absolute. After doing a little research, I decided to try.

Now no carbs would mean I'm out bread, rice and pasta. I knew that much up front and thought to myself, that's what I eat on a regular. Starting Keto, my own menu honestly consisted of Steak, Ribs, Baked Chicken, 80/20 ground beef, Cheese, Asparagus, Salads and a whole lotta Avocado. It's been 5 months and adjusting to this lifestyle was a lot easier then I thought. I'm down 35 pounds and am in no rush to down another 35. What I do know, is that I take it one day and a time, one workout at a time and one meal at a time.

It gets hard to balance with all the other filler tasks of my day. But I manage. Now that I have adjusted to Keto. Starting well, today, I am incorporating the "Intermittent Fast." I've gone through a few blogs / vlogs and social media posts on different adaptations to incorporating the Intermittent Fast. The plan is to simply eat ONCE a day between the hours of 12 and 3 pm and outside of that time frame will be strictly - water or green tea.

We'll revisit this topic in another say 4 months and report. =)

XOXO Via

Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Oh, Hello There

So ummm.... Happy New Year? lol

Am I too late for that? haha I remember a time when I was posting once or twice a day and then it dwindled to once a week, now I'm pretty much at once a year. lol

It's not that I've forgotten about my, I've actually written and re-written this post quite a few times cause I really don't know where to start or how, to update. I know right, lame.

First lets throw out the bigger bombs...

Back in December..... I left Leroy.

I know, I know, hold the applause. It's been quite the journey for the past few months of being under wraps. Not that I'm hiding. I just have needed my own space, you know what I mean. With a decision quite this big given our past, I think I would be worried if I didnt take a little break from it all.

So lets rewind.

Things had spiraled downward with him when we moved out to our own place. The freedom of being out on our own, taking on the world and simply having the ability to do whatever seemed to appeal to his own wants. I mean, boys will be boys, yes, but this was a whole different level that I just couldn't get a grip on how out of control things had gotten. So I wouldn't say that me walking was me giving up cause if I'm being completely honest, I really in my heart of hearts tried my hardest to hold it down and keep it together. But you can't really force someone to be or do something they don't want to, so I walked.

I absolutely love Leroy. I always will. But us together in that sense is just not a good thing. After going on  months of being separated, I have finally decided to make it final. Mind you, this is our second marriage at trying to keep our family together. I really needed the time to make sure this is what I truly want. So a few weeks ago, I have filed my divorce and am now ready to take on the world on my own, with my kids under my wing of course. lol

I don't regret any of it. Not at all. I'm glad I married him again, even though it didn't last because after our marriage ended the first time, I remember wishing I would've tried harder and that if I ever had the chance to do it again, I would most certainly give it my all. So this second round was my all. And although it didn't end successfully "together", I have no doubt that it can still end successfully apart.

Closing this chapter in my life is bittersweet but also renewing. It's like I've been given another chance at starting over. Leroy and I get along so much better apart anyway.

I won't lie, it would've been nice to give my kids the life I dreamed of with the whole "family" aspect of it. But sometimes, life throws you a curve ball, you have to be able to adjust and be ready for these change ups.


For the past few months, I 've been focusing on mostly myself. I have been working out and have found my release is found with running with my headphones in. I feel unplugged from the world and it's just me. It gives me a place that I can just let go of negative things.

I'm tons more positive these days and feel like I have found life's true Bliss.


I continued my membership with Vasa Fitness and the days there are no available spots for the kids, I take them to the park and just do what I can there. The kids find it more fun this way anyway. We had stopped by Liberty Park to get in some running and some scootering. lol Then after we fed the ducks. This was tons of fun.

I can't wait to update the kids, things have changed a lot with them. =)

XOXO Via